I miss my dad. Today was just one of those hard days. I thought of him often. I was witness to many reminders that he is gone, reflected on all the moments we have lost. Vivid memories of times past flooded my mind with excitement, convincing me that all was well; surreal images of a healthy man, teaching, talking, being.
It is so easy to forget the sadness when enthralled in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. But eventually it arrives, shoring up like a tsunami, its massive waves thundering onto land, destroying all that gets in harms way. Next comes the numbing pain that simply punches you in the stomach so hard you can't breathe. And then it's pure anger, the final thrusting of a massive dagger into the heart, the final hit that takes you down, if only for a second.
It just doesn't seem fair.
I love my pops, and dammit I miss having him around.
Sometimes all that can heal is a real good cry. So tonight I say, thank you tears. I will sleep better now that we have had our time to grieve together.