Green Recovery

Life happens.

I was feeling neglectful today; having not posted here for weeks.  I do have a few ideas for a nice lengthy post to do over the weekend, but for now, I will simply share a little something that feels like a real milestone.  I have been less than private about many things that have happened and are happening in my life up until now, as this blog really is my medium to face, accept, and move on from hardships, heartbreak, and herculean hiccups.  This blog is, after all, my place of hope, healing and happiness. 

A couple of weeks ago, I took a leap outside of my comfy site, and shared my struggle with bulimia via an outside source, a wonderful website called "Choosing Raw".  Gena Hamshaw is the creator, and she is also the brilliant creature behind the "Green Recovery Series" - stories written by and about folks that have found freedom from their eating disorders by adopting a vegan lifestyle.  After reading a few entries there, I knew I wanted to share my story.  So I did.  And she did.  And I got my very own special category of "recovery-in-progress", as I do believe that my recovery will be a life long project.

It felt GREAT to speak out.  And I feel so blessed to have received so many honest, touching, and inspired comments on the piece.  On behalf of all of us Green Recover-ers, and all that fight disordered eating, thank you Gena.  

Here it is:

http://www.choosingraw.com/recovery-in-progress-meghans-story/ 

NYC!

New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There's nothin' you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York,
New York

Love that song.  I felt it, and played it over and over in my head whilst whiling away the time on my recent solo adventure into Manhattan, a certain affair to remember.

I am blessed to have been able to make this trip happen, as I am definitely not flush with money these days, with my various class and course fees  draining my back account.  But as luck would have it, I booked just earlier enough to snag a crazy good deal on round trip bus fare, and I was able to arrange superior accommodations in Washington Heights with a friend.  More on that later...

I left late on a Thursday, via the overnight Greyhound, beet and carrot juice in hand.  After a slick and quick trip across the border (yay, no illegal travelers on board!), I managed to squeeze in a few hours of solid shut-eye before awakening at 6:15am, just as the sun was rising over the Manhattan skyline, and and we were soon to enter the tunnel to the island.  Wow, what a view.  I knew at that instant, that this was going to be a weekend to remember. 

After our on-time arrival at the Port Authority terminal, it was only a quick jaunt up to Columbus circle followed by a short walk to ABC studios, where I had a VIP ticket to see "Live with Kelly".  Thanks to Kieran, one of the stellar producers at my TV show for hooking a sister up!  A perfect way to kick of my adventure.

Maggie Q with Kelly and co-host & hubster Mark

So how did I spend the rest of my trip, you ask?  Really? Well if you really do want  scoop, then keep on reading, friends!

First stop post-Live with Kelly: "Organic Avenue"- the BEST veggie juice joint in the city!

Lunch was the Aztec salad at Candle Cafe: Upper West Side.  Impeccable service, great atmosphere, outstanding food!  Funnily enough, as I jotted down notes in my scratchpad, glanced around the room engagingly, and just really "took it all in", I became pretty convinced the staff thought I was a food critic.  Half way through the meal, I had far more servers attend to me than necessary (with gushingly kind treatment), and my every move was observed until they pretty much followed out the door upon my exit!  Super fun; new career perhaps??

That evening, I was lucky enough to have scored complimentary admission to hear one of my inspirations speak live at "Spirit Junkie Church".  Okay, so it was actually Middle Collegiate Church in the East Village, but the huge crowd that assembled to hear Gabrielle Bernstein lecture on the topic of "Manifesting Desires", sure appeared a faithful following.  I love hearing her speak, and each time I do, I feel immense passion about all she inspires, and I always leave fueled for positive change.  She is a true sweetheart to meet, and a real smart cookie. 

My religious experience ended shortly after 9pm, and good thing too, as I had a hot date at "Pure Food & Wine" for 9:30pm with my long lost (cue the violins - no don't) cousin, Grace.  Grace is my father's-cousins-daughter, whom I met previously way back when I was in grade ten.  We had immediately bonded on that visit, getting all boozed up on rum and cokes on a boat in the neighbouring town (you'll recall, I had a very intimate relationship with alcohol at very young age).  I had not seen Grace since that time, but she was gracious enough to offer up her living room to me as my home away from home for the entire time I was in NYC.  So grateful. 

Hen of the Woods Tacos al Pastor - smoked guacamole, hearts of palm, chayote squash, guajillo crema fresca, pickled onions

Sweet Corn and Cashew Tamales with Chili Spiced Portabella - salsa verde, cashew coconut sour cream, avocado, raw cacao mole

Saturday morn!  What a glorious morning it was!  What better way to start off the day, than with a brisk ride into the Heights to hit up the local farmer's market!

Grace, with her hot tamales in hand.

That afternoon, I ventured out solo, and walked...and walked...and walked.  Here, just a few yummy moments from my day:

Lunch: Angelica's Kitchen, East Village

 

Mid-day, I met up with a fellow Torontonian and media professional, that I have known for, what, maybe ten years?  She and I met ages ago at CityTV, but have never had the chance to get together one on one while at home.  So what better time to meet up for drinks then when we both just so happen to be chilling in NYC?  Natalie was in town on business, but was able to free up a few (4) hours to meet for a therapeutic glass (or several) of bubbly at the Central Park Boathouse, the sight of my now irrelevant engagement proposal two years ago.  It was divine and full of wine, and a gorgeous day to enjoy the sunshine on the packed and pretty patio! 

Prettiness at Bryant park...

Last stop on Saturday, was my much anticipated dinner at "Candle 79", the grand-daddy home of vegan cuisines.  This comfy, cozy, classy resto is located in the Upper East side and was everything I had imagined.    I enjoyed a table for one in the upper level of the dining room, sandwiched in between two lovey-dovey couples.  That was just fine by me, as I had my city, my dress, and my glass of wine as my date, and was feeling just sublime.  I decided on an entree of their LIVE lasagna, a plate that served far superior to my delish version of the raw "pasta" dish from home.  I savoured this plate for well over 40 minutes, absorbing all the brilliant flavours and textures, eating every morsel with gratitude.  By 10pm I was ready for dessert, another glass of wine, and then I was off.  

A long walk towards home via Central Park, passing the classic carriage ride circle at the foot of the green-space, and I was ready to call it a night.  A weekend.  A milestone.  

That was my New York after all, a whole new round of memories, each one my own, each one a gift.  

It was a hot date indeed, and I am already planning my next rendezvous with my American lover come July.

Just Wow.

I was just thinking about how much my day job rocks.  Seriously. So what if I have to wake up by 4am every day, and I need to nap just to live a somewhat "normal" life?  I have the pleasure of walking into my "office" every morning knowing that I get to work with the most amazing team of on-air talent that never fail to crack me up consistently day in, and day out.  I also have a super talented crew of producers, technical personnel, and production staff that make my job as studio "mom" both fun and exciting. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  Not to mention, I get to be one of the first people to meet every single celebrity and not-so-celebrity that walks through the door, and man oh man, have I met a few icons!

Case in point - Connie Chung.  WOW.  Gratitude.  That is all. 

Grand Predictions!

The universe appears to be on my side today!  And if all that is written in my stars happens to come true, than today, my friends, is going to be a gooood day.  I'm just sayin. 

Each morning, I have two separate and usually very different horoscope forecasts sent my way via email.  Today, here is what they had to say:

Scorpio- Wednesday, May 2, 2012
The stars will bestow you with all the energy you need to further your goals and plans. The waxing Moon will help you burst through whatever restrictions have been holding you back. A certain degree of upheaval is involved, but you won’t mind that a bit once you get a whiff of the success that awaits you.

Your horoscope for May 2, 2012 
 If you've been working toward manifesting extra money in your life, meg, today you'll probably see it happen. Your inner powers of mind-over-matter are given a special impetus by copious physical and emotional energy, and you might just see the results you've wanted in finance and in other matters as well. Business and career interests should also be going well, as could any personal projects of your own. Keep up the good work!

Not too shabby I'd say.  And it just so happens, I have a few exciting things in the works right now, and extra cash, energy and willpower are just what this gal needs! 

Oh, and sort of in the same realm of life shifts and change, I thought I'd share a picture.  As it is it clear, I am all about "putting it out there" these days; telling my personal stories has really helped me move on from a lot of crap in my life.  So here is an image of a moment that will forever be etched in my mind:

At a recent Gabrielle Bernstein lecture, I volunteered to admit my "burning desire" for change and fear release in my life...This is me exposing my secret to hundreds of strangers. On a mic.  Delightful.

I love food. Did'ya know?

Nut butter-goji-flax power balls

A slightly different kind of post today, all about my biggest passion: healthy, yummy food!

I have a crazy busy schedule this week, and I am finding myself at home for no more than an hour or two at a time. With this week being as kooky as it is, and with my upcoming road trip to NYC, I know that I will need some quick, easy, on the go energy to help power me through my long days.  Over this past weekend, I spent many hours in my kitchen, perfecting an entree recipe of mine as part of an assignment for my culinary nutrition course (recipe to come!).  I wasn't the only one working away on that, and after seeing all the Facebook postings, and Twitter updates from many of my schoolmates about their food creations, I was inspired.  Yesterday afternoon, I happily found myself with 60 minutes of me-time, and so after juicing what felt like every last ounce of fresh veggies I had left in my fridge for my afternoon green gulp, I figured I would also try and clean out a few pantry items that I am due to re-stock as well.  And with that, I whipped up a batch of all-new edible delights that I am calling "Nut butter-goji-flax power balls".  Super simple, super tasty!

Whatcha Need: 

1/3 C ground flax

1 1/2 T sunflower butter

1 T peanut butter (almond would be yummy too!)

1 1/2 T ground goji berries (they grind well in the blender)

1/4 C ground almond (I used pre-ground meal)

1 1/2 tsp sesame seeds

1 tsp. cocoa powder

1/2 tsp natural vanilla extract

1 T chia seeds

1 1/2 T raw honey*

Whatcha Do:

Mix all the ingredients with a wooden spoon or spatula until combined and easily handled.  Roll into balls. Refrigerate. Eat. Yum. Energy. Power.

*I eat a primarily vegan diet - no meat, poultry, fish, dairy, or eggs.  I do however consume raw honey;there are just too many health benefits not to, and it is simply an amazing sweetener.

Life.

Life is crazy delicious, isn't it?

I have to admit, I am simply exhausted more often than not right now, but at the end of each day, as I crawl into bed, turn on my ocean waves sound machine, and put on my sleep mask (yep, you need one of those when you go to bed before the sun goes down), I am nothing short of thrilled, grateful, and truly happy. 

Everything in my life seems to be rolling along as it should; pieces of the puzzle that I have taken 31 years to solve are slowly falling into place, serendipitous events are unfolding all around me, paths are intertwining with the characters I need most to meet, and I feel good.  I do wish I had more free time to devote to my family and friends right now however; I have sadly had to reschedule my trip home to see mom several times, and dates with my closest girlfriends have been shuffled around like pawns on a chess board.  And so it begs the question, how on earth did I think I had the time to date again?  A few weeks in on an online dating site, and it is clear to me that love may not be in the cards for me just yet.  I have no idea when I might even squeeze in a simple coffee rendezvous!  But, I soldier on, and do see the light at the end of this 18 hour day cycle, and it is beautiful.  

This week is going to be an epic one for me, as I have much awesomeness planned, and I am sure I will have many a story to tell via my next blog.  It's a 3 day workweek for this gal, and I am excited to be VIPing at my fave Spirit Junkie, Gabrielle Bernstein's reception & lecture on Tuesday night here in TO.  Wednesday (which will be my FRIDAY this week!) has me headed North to Barrie to hear from David Wolfe - "The rock star of the superfoods and longevity world".  He is scheduled to speak from 6pm til 11:30pm, but from what I hear, we will be there into the wee hours of the morning!  I am so pumped!  There are a few carloads of ladies from my culinary course making the pilgrimage together, and I am sure it is going to be an inspiring, raucous, and exciting night!  And then...on Thursday I head off on my much-needed NYC getaway, my solo excursion to the city that I admittedly would cheat on TO with, no contest.  I have my days booked solid, including meals at all the best vegan food joints, and some required TV related stops (while in NYC, I must check out the big, bright, and fancy network studios!).  Friday night I am again going to see Gabby B, this time for her "Manifesting your Desires" workshop, and then on Saturday morning, I have a date with a local farmers market via bicycle with my lovely hostess for the weekend, Grace.  I am also excited to share a bite at some point with a dear old CityTv colleague, that I haven't seen in close to 5 years, and just so happens to be visiting NY simultaneously.  

And after that?  Well, I have a few weeks left in my culinary course, and have nailed down one of my co-op placements with Belmonte Raw, the sassy, hip, and real raw food boutique in Leslieville that I encourage you all to check out.  Later on in May I am all signed up to earn my level 1 Reiki certification, and I also hope to finally write my Canfit Fitness Instructor exam!  And to wrap up the month, I will be taking yet another course with Meghan Telpner, only this time it's a business and marketing workshop!  I am hoping this will help me develop more focus about what exactly I plan to do with all these sexy new skills I am layering onto my being these days!

So yes, life is grand.  I'm tired, but it's a fatigue from fun and fabulous-ness, so I'll take it any day.

A conversation with Meg

Scorpio- Saturday, April 7, 2012 
An old repetitive and never-ending problem is going to get resolved once and for all. It may not seem like it considering the way things have been going lately, yet improvement is happening in areas of your life where it really counts. The only way to go is forward. Success is waiting for you.    

Huh.  Nice way to start my day, reading that there horoscope before even rising out of my bed at 7am.  Immediately I thought, yes, I must blog about this.

I think we all have at least one area in our life that we truly want to change for the better.  One specific habit, an old repetitive and never-ending problem, that we so desire to resolve once and for all, but we are just too frightened to make that huge paradigm shift.  I know I do.

It's funny, because just yesterday, whilst walking home from Whole Foods, I decided to have a conversation with myself about just that problem of mine.  I had recently read an article about why it is so damn hard for us to make positive changes in the most important areas of our lives when we know exactly what it is we need to do, to do it.  The writing stated that quite often it is simply an issue of our "child-like" selves resisting the ideas for change brought on by our "adult" selves, and thus sabotaging all of our efforts.  The article went on to say that the first step in making massive transformation in our lives is to simply have a conversation with our kid-self.  This internal chat should focus on distilling the FEAR that our child self feels about the change.  We also must insist that our grownup self will take care and ensure protection and safety into the soon to be new way of thinking and doing...

So yes, I talked to myself.  Half out loud I might add.  I must have looked mildly of a crazy person walking through Rosedale muttering words of encouragement under my breath to my mini-me.  But I did feel better after the "talk".  I felt lighter.  Calmer.  Total placebo effect?  Maybe.  But isn't that exactly what it is? Shifting perception equals a shifted reality after all.

Now upon receiving my astrological prediction for today, it only adds fuel to my fires of motivation.  Yes, most areas of my life are a rockin' - really and truly great.  And if I can revamp this one zone in my world, and END my never-ending problem, I can only imagine what amazing things will result...

So today I suggest to you, please sit down, take a breath, and say hello to your kid-self and give him or her a hug.  Have a conversation and see what transpires.  You just might be surprised.